Tuesday, December 4, 2018

Will They Save America?


---------- Forwarded message ---------
From: The Borowitz Report <NewYorker@newsletter.newyorker.com>
Date: Tue, Dec 4, 2018, 13:43
Subject: Will They Save America?
To: <trrytrvrs@gmail.com>


As allegations of election fraud shake North Carolina, an unexpected coalition may step up to help.
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Not the news.

People waiting in line to vote. Satire from The Borowitz Report

Iraq Offers to Help Establish Democracy in North Carolina

"We will be greeted as liberators," the Iraqi President predicted.

By Andy Borowitz
Scott Walker
Satire from The Borowitz Report

Unskilled Wisconsin Man Unable to Keep Job

Scott Walker had been an employee of Koch Industries since 2010 until he was unceremoniously dismissed.

By Andy Borowitz
Satire from The Borowitz Report

Trump Deletes Nine Tweets While Attempting to Spell "Subpoena"

"I've never seen him so enraged," a source said. "He hates the word 'subpoena' more than the E.P.A. hates the words 'climate' and 'change.' "

By Andy Borowitz

More Humor from The New Yorker

Illustration of woman being tapped on the shoulder
Shouts & Murmurs

Algorithms

If you like responding to only every third e-mail you get from someone, you might also like buying a house on the edge of a cliff.

By Henry Alford
Woman drinking wine
Daily Shouts

Is It Too Early for This?

It's 4 P.M. The sun has set. Too soon for p.j.s?

By Amy Kurzweil
Pistachios and almonds.
Daily Shouts

Pistachios vs. Almonds

Pistachios are part of the cashew family. Almonds are part of the rose family but don't really talk to them anymore since Karen's wedding.

By Jonny Auping
PAID POST

See a New Side of Europe and Skip the Crowds in 2019 with Rick Steves

Don't let long lines and tourist traps ruin your trip! Travel expert Rick Steves knows how to see Europe without the crowds, and it's the perfect time to plan a 2019 trip. Here's where to go to explore authentic, off-the-radar Europe. Read More

Back to the Real News . . .

Garry Kasparov. The New Yorker Interview

Garry Kasparov's Optimism Amid Chaos

The chess grandmaster and political activist on Putin, Trump, and how we are living again through the eighteen-fifties.

By Masha Gessen
Illustration of Jeff Dean and Sanjay Ghemawat Annals of Technology

The Friendship That Made Google Huge

Coding together at the same computer, Jeff Dean and Sanjay Ghemawat changed the course of the company—and the Internet.

By James Somers
Illustration of 3 figures overlapping and reading books 2018 in Review

The Best Books of 2018

Each of these titles represents an energizing alternative to the ripped-apart illogic of our contemporary reality.

By Katy Waldman
Anti Brexit campaigners outside the Houses of Parliament on December 03, 2018 in London, England. Letter from the U.K.

Staying in Britain After Brexit

The gigantic bureaucratic effort to process European migrants living in the United Kingdom via smartphone app will disadvantage those who are poorer, older, and don't speak much English.

By Sam Knight

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